UA-69018437-1
Technically Invisible

Reigning Taxes

Greetings. Queen Suzy, here.  I recently spent two days at Mullen-Hall School in Colony 204 along with my fellow royals – Duchess of the Bell and Lady Price.

Lady Price, Queen Suzy and Duchess of the Bell

We felt it imperative to visit the Colony personally because it had become awfully expensive to keep it running.  With all the children requiring pencils, paper and quality instruction, the costs were adding up. We arrived Tuesday morning in order to introduce our new tax structure.  Each student was given a job in the colony (we must each pull our own weight!) ranging from milliners to farmers, tax collectors to coopers.  Two students were valued members of Parliament, and spent the day advising us on the workings of the Colony.  Once each colonist was paid (40 beans), it was time to explain the tax structure:

It wasn’t long before my loyal subjects were paying beans left and right. Though some were willing to give up a few of life’s luxuries in order to avoid a tax or two, I was pleased to see the beans accumulate in our depository.

Many gave up chairs, rather than pay for the Chair Tax.

And the beans pile up...

We still did the important work of the Colony, even though the setting had changed.

The end of Day One rolled around… I invited Duchess of the Bell and Lady Price out for a shopping spree and a nice dinner, as we had collected a generous amount of beans!  We made plans to return to Colony 204 the following day, as we realized our loyal subjects were more than willing income sources.  Our loyal Parliament members had recommended new income sources, such as snack, book and cushion taxes, and noise and running fines. We had lots of new ideas to work with.

Day Two found us wearing luxurious furs, larger crowns and we were dripping in jewels.  We unleashed our new tax structure, and it seemed our loyal subjects weren’t all that pleased.  I am not sure exactly why?

We were not welcomed with open arms, however, our young colonists seemed to accept their plight.  Soon, they were thankful to have such caring royal leaders, because we noticed another colony had popped up nearby.  It seemed that Queen Holly had arrived in Colony 201.

Being the diplomat I am, I traveled to Colony 201, to welcome Queen Holly and her subjects. I inquired about her intentions, and it seemed to me that while very pleasantly elusive in her answers, I feared she may be looking to expand her colony.

Loyal Subjects at the Depository

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, I was beginning to panic a bit. I was worried that I had never properly measured my colony, so I wrote a letter to Queen Holly, which was delivered by my royal couriers.

“Dear Queen Holly, I have heard you are an Everyday Math Colony. We, being a Math in Focus colony, are in dire need of some EDM rulers.  Two will suffice.  Will this payment cover the cost? I have to measure my colony.  Your powerful friend, Queen Suzy of the World.”

Her response was immediate, as she sent back my couriers with only one ruler and a note.:

“Dear Queen Suzy of the Tiny Colony 204,  I am quite insulted that you feel that paltry payment of one coffer of pence would be enough for TWO WHOLE rulers.  Signed, Your Exceptionally Powerful Queen (who hopes to expand) ~ Queen Holly the Lovely.”

The NERVE of some royalty…  I set to writing, with most of my subjects looking on….

“Oh Queen Holly, It is my understanding that our currency is worth far more than yours. This one bean should more than cover the cost of your rule, er… I mean ruler.  Your Queen Suzy of the World.”

The response was immediate….

“Dear Queen Suzy, It is unfortunate because in my divine I WAS going to give you a royal tape measure as that would have clearly sped up your work. However, your continued insult to my colony means I will not be that generous. Another ruler will cost AT LEAST ten of your tiny insignificant beans!  Signed, The Best Queen ~ Queen Holly”

It was clear to us now, that Queen Holly was not backing down.  I knew I had to keep collecting taxes to pay for protection from such an unfriendly colony.

Duchess of the Bell and Lady Price lay the new taxes on our unhappy colonists.

Duchess of the Bell and Lady Price announced to the colony that once again we were going to raise taxes.

In fact, my loyal subjects were inspired to write letters of their own.  Some were antagonistic, assuring Queen Holly that we were a strong enough colony to stay put, and to cancel her plans of expansion. A few letters begged her not to expand, as that seemed to be causing the Taxes in 204 to rise exponentially.  Please stop, they begged. Do it for the children.  We received one last letter:
Dear Suzy, Colony 204 Parliament and Colonists, I WILL take your land. As you stated, my kingdom is much too small for our needs. We need more land.  Your beans, or lack thereof, are most certainly NOT my concern.  Signed – Your SOON-to-be New Ruler, Queen Holly”

At this point, we were having some issues.  Some colonists had run out of beans, and could not pay taxes.  COULD NOT PAY TAXES???  Of course, they ended up in jail, which was very sad indeed.

Working hard at math while in jail.

Soon, the writing was on the wall, I, Queen Suzy and my Royal court knew it was time to go.  We would have to find our fortune elsewhere.  We abandoned ship, and took our beans with us, leaving Colony 204 high and dry.  Soon, we saw they were in good hands:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Phew! Mrs. Brooks, here.  With Queen Suzy, Duchess of the Bell and Lady Price long gone, we were able to meet as a class and discuss their two long days under royal rule.

We compared and contrasted our plight with that of the REAL colonists. We talked about protests, and how our students protested in small ways, but the colonists had to be brave and protest in big ways.  Each student spent time during the two days blogging about his or her own experience – be sure to check out their blog posts at our Kidblog page!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Until next year,

3 thoughts on “Reigning Taxes

  1. Ms. Sawyer

    Dear Mrs. Brooks and the students of Room 204,

    Wow! I am SO glad you are all safe and sound after the tyranny of the royalty who arrived at Mullen-Hall. I had no idea such things were happening while I was out of my classroom. That Queen Holly sounds just awful!! Thankfully it is just us again and we can get back to business.

    Sincerely,
    Ms. Sawyer 🙂

  2. Grandpa 8

    OMG, i remember the taxes, oh, i was lucky, i was a visitor or something, but i didn’t have to pay, and when i did pay, i didn’t wear any pants with pockets, half the class didn’t sit in chairs, and noone drank from the fountain. Half of the boys didn’t want to go to the bathroom. Even people tried reusing paper and using the dullest pencils i’ve ever seen. Ahhh, the good old days.

    Keep me posted,
    Grandpa

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *