This post has been in the making for a (long) while, but has been difficult for me to write. I avoid difficult topics and it’s easy to see this is one. I am the parent of two teenagers who are both active on social media. Additionally, I have a job where monitoring the online activity of students is part of my responsibility. Basically, it is up to me to watch what kids are doing, and then do something about it. Easier said, than done. It’s hard enough when your own child posts something iffy, but when it is the child of someone else? It becomes more complicated! Let’s just say I’ve had too much experience saying ” #WeedYourFeed ” in one way or another.
While I am lucky to have the techno-know-how to monitor activity and keep up with what kids are up to online, I am also burdened by that responsibility. On my desktop, I have a folder full of screen-shots from the feeds of my kids, as well as “my kids”. Many post inappropriate content on the Internet, which sadly goes unnoticed by adults responsible for guiding them. I’ve seen Twitter, Insta and Facebook posts that have made me cringe. I’ve seen Google searches make my head spin and some search results have made my eyes bleed and my stomach turn. Those experiences pale in comparison to how difficult it is talking to parents about what I’ve seen their child post.
When students post online, they are opening a window through which we view them. I find teenagers (really ages 10 and up) are often willing to trade privacy for attention; personal information for peer approval. While some of my findings have resulted in redirection and reprimands, others have resulted in referrals to parents and service providers. Unfortunately, the number of adults monitoring the choices and behavior of teenagers online is severely lacking. It’s an unsafe ratio based on excuses and ignorance, and something has got to change. We guide children through the process of opening bank accounts, buying cars and applying for college. There is no reason why we should allow them to “figure out” the Internet without our support and guidance.
Whether kids are posting revealing photos, using vile language, attacking other kids or sharing inappropriate posts, it is imperative we call them out and remind them of the ramifications of their choices. How are colleges, employers, teachers or community members viewing them? Will their choices have an affect on future opportunities? As teenagers become older, how much of a say do (and should) we have on their choices? Weeding an 18-year-old’s feed is different than intervening with one of a 12-year old.
October 18-24 is Digital Citizen Week. Common Sense Media is reminding us to #HaveTheTalk. You know – THE talk about how to design your own PERMANENT digital footprint. Remember, having The Talk once is not going to make a difference. An ongoing, open dialogue is necessary to guide digital citizens as they carve their path moving forward. I’m wearing my gardening gloves and am ready to do some weeding. Are you??
Dream Big,
